Talk it Up

"I am not afraid of storms, for I am learning how to sail my ship."– Louisa May Alcott

When it comes to conflict, what animal are you?

Conflict is everywhere–in the workplace, in politics, in the classroom and even in Girl Scout troops. Anytime you have more than one person working on a common goal, you have differences of opinions and unique styles in dealing with how to achieve the goal. The definition of conflict is – actual or perceived opposition of needs, values and interests." A clash of interests, values, actions or directions can often spark a conflict.

Whether your troop includes new girls who are still getting acquainted, or lifetime friends, you've probably had to resolve a conflict. It helps to have the girls get to know each other and their styles for handling conflict. I recently came across this fun activity to do before conflicts arise.

Supplies: Large blank labels and felt markers Preparation: Create with a posted listing just the names of the animals below. On another poster, include the animals' names plus the descriptions of how they handle conflict: Koala Everyone's friend. Usually gives in. Hates conflict and avoids it as much as possible to get along with people. Nice, easy to get along with, and agreeable.

Dolphin
Smooth, smart, looks good, very good at public relations, but a bit of a show-off. Moves around in a crowd and follows anyone who has a new idea, but doesn't stay around to solve problems; leaves them to someone else to follow through and do the work. Can be defensive when challenged, making them hard to work with.

Shark
Has to win. Goes for the jugular. Forces the issue. Pushes people around. Argues long and loud. There are winners and losers, and sharks want to win at all cost. They attack, intimidate, use power tactics and abuse to get their way.

Parakeet
Everyone likes them. Problem solvers. Very loyal to their partners, but work well in groups. Fly around everywhere looking for solutions. Work at problems until solved. Talks rather than fights. Friendly. Good listeners.

Groundhog
At the first sign of conflict, goes to the ground, backs down, gets into a hole. Avoids talking about anything that will lead to conflict and backs off from people who want to talk through things.

House Cat
Basically out for themselves, but can cajole and persuade when necessary. Can be nice when satisfied, curl up in people's laps when they get what they want. Their approach is subtle; they rub themselves up against people and purr to create a good impression and get what they want. They don't help others or solve anyone else's problems but their own. They are individualists and don't work well in groups. If another cat has what they want, they either slink up and take it or they attack the other and fight.

Activity:
Show your girls the first poster (listing just animals), and ask them to:

1. Decide which animal best describes them when they are upset or trying to deal with a conflict.
2. Write that animal (or select a new one) on their label and wear it.
3. Find someone with the same label and share examples of behavior that fit that animal.
4. Find someone with a different label and share examples of the animals' behaviors.

Then show them the second poster and talk about their reactions. Do they agree with the descriptions? Were there any surprises? Do they think they were right in picking their animal? Can they see themselves the way others see them?

Talk it up!